A friend thought it would be great if I wrote about my family on my blog.  I agree.  So I am going to tell a story about each person in my family.  And I’m going to start with my oldest – Janay.

1985 – Seattle, Washington

She was 21 years old.  She had only been married six months when a suspicious nausea came over her. It was time to go see the OB/GYN.  Her feet, dangling from the exam table, wiggled nervously.  She knew what she wanted to hear, but didn’t want to get her hopes up.  The doctor  came back into the room and gave her the news that she had hoped to get. She was pregnant! Her lifelong dream of becoming a mom would now be a reality. 

This was a little premature in terms of  practicality.  Always the realist, her husband was excited, but slightly fearful.  They had no money.  He was going to graduate school full time and both of them were working full time.  How in the world would they be able to make ends meet with another little person added to their family?

She knew she should be worried,but she wasn’t.  The only thing she felt besides nausea, was sheer excitement.  A baby growing inside her.  As she rubbed her still flat belly, she knew she already loved motherhood.

The pregnancy seemed to hold new experiences and surprises every day.  Top ramen was no longer an option.  That and various other tastes and smells made her stomach want to turn inside out.  She got new freckles every day.  She was ready for bed by eight every night.  And as the months went on, she found out what stretch marks were all about.  There were days when she could actually feel her skin ripping apart like a giant zipper.  The house they lived in was so tiny that she would have to lift her huge belly up over the portable dishwasher to get through the kitchen into the bathroom. She was anything but a pretty picture by the end, but she was so very happy.

These were the days before ultrasounds were routine, so the sex of the baby was a surprise.  As  ice cream would drip on her ever growing belly, she wondered if this precious child would be a boy or a girl.  Secretly, she was hoping for a girl.  She and her husband talked about many names.  It would be Brandon if it was a boy.  The girl names were harder to narrow down.  Ashley, Lindsay.  But then she remembered a name she had picked when she was only fourteen and dreamed of being a mother some day.  Janay.  A variation of her own name.  That was it – Janay Rochelle.

Months passed and by mid summer, time slowed to a crawl.  She so wanted to see and know this precious baby growing within her.  The fierce kicks, gentle hiccups, and constant somersaults were a continual reminder of the reality of this little life that would change their lives forever.  The summer heat was nearly unbearable in the little house.  Trips to the mall were the only escape from the heat.

One evening her husband suggested one such trip to the mall.  More than willing, she went into the bedroom to put her sandals on.  As she bent down to buckle her shoe, she had a strange, wet sensation running down her legs.  She yelled out, “I’m peeing my pants and I can’t stop!”  Her husband gently reminded her that she was nine months pregnant and that it was more likely that her water had just broken.

Frazzled and not prepared (it was still two weeks before the due date), they scrambled to pack  a bag and headed to the hospital.  At this point there was no pain from contractions, so the couple just chatted excitedly, wondering how there lives were about to enter completely uncharted territory. 

Nurses confirmed that her water  really had broken, and that they would have to remain in the hospital until the baby was born to prevent infection.  Which was fine by her.  She was not planning on leaving this hospital without a baby in her arms.  And wait they did.  Twenty four hours passed.  Forty eight.  Still no contractions.  Her frustration and impatience rose.  She was tired of the hospital bed and the hospital food.  She was tired of being hooked up to tubes and wires.  And she was tired of sitting there waiting for pain to begin. 

Seventy two hours later, they discovered something.  Her water had indeed broken days before, but it had somehow sealed back over.  Little baby was still floating in a snug little uterus, as comfortable as could be, while mom sat not so patiently waiting. A foreshadowing of motherhood to come…

Once they solved the sealing issue, things began to change rapidly.  This is what contractions felt like!  She should be moaning in pain, but she was so happy for progress that she smiled with each tightening of her uterus.  Until it came down to, literally, the eleventh hour.  Transition was a whole new level and this was no longer fun.  At hour twelve the doctor came and checked her and said it was time to push.  Hallelujah!  A baby was about to come into the world!

Or maybe not…Pushing was not as simple as she thought it would be.  To try and figure out how to push from a place that had never done that before was not an easy thing. This is why delivery produced bowel movements before it produced babies. Hours passed, and as sweat poured from her forehead, her husband stroked her hair and told her how beautiful and brave she was.  She didn’t feel beautiful or brave and just wanted this to be over.

She knew she did not have the strength to push one more time, but she also knew that if she didn’t, this pain would not end.  So with everything in her, she pushed,  The ring of fire that she had heard about in birthing class was now a reality and much worse than they had described.  Holding her husband’s hand, she clinched her jaw and let out a gutteral yell.  And then she heard it.  The beautiful sound of a baby’s sweet cry.  Her precious baby girl.  She yelled at the top of her lungs for all to hear – “I got my girl!”

She looked at her husband who was cutting the umbilical cord.  He was smiling and crying at the same time.  The doctor handed him his precious daughter and he brought the fussing bundle to her.  Janay’s eyes were wide open and she looked up into her mother’s face.  And there began the most amazing  and indescribable human connection – a mother and her child.  A lifetime love affair.

Daddy took Janay to the nursery to be checked.  Mommy watched as she saw her husband transform into a father before her very eyes.  His protective nature came without even trying.  His nurturing heart on his sleeve for all to see. A father’s love for his firstborn daughter.  Possibly one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen.  And so what had been a journey of two became an adventure of three.  And Janay Rochelle Jarvis stole the hearts of her parents that day and they have never recovered since. 🙂

There are many stories to tell of all that Janay has been to them for the past 24 years.  There would never be enough time to recount it all.  But know this.  That she has always been and will always be the girl with the huge heart.  The girl that has loved Jesus passionately since age three and wants to share him with others.  The girl that became a loving big sister to four younger siblings.  The girl that always has compassion for those in need and pain. The talented artistic girl who will always have a hunger  for adventure. The girl that has made her parents smile and burst with pride because of her heart and her life.  Janay, you made us into parents.  Thanks forever for making it such a joy and privilege.  Your name means Gift from God.  That could not be a more perfect description.  Love you, sis.  Forever and ever.